There are times that I cannot take the pressure anymore that I burst into tears. Some may find this weird or even funny but it's very hard to lose something which you have kept safe until someone so stupid takes it away and misplaces it. I really hate it.
A peek into the deranged mind of a 30-something guy as he lives his life as a Registered Nurse and as a Filipino-Canadian.
Tuesday, October 31, 2006
Losing Something
There are times that I cannot take the pressure anymore that I burst into tears. Some may find this weird or even funny but it's very hard to lose something which you have kept safe until someone so stupid takes it away and misplaces it. I really hate it.
Sunday, October 29, 2006
Who am I?
Enneagram Type 4 - The Individualist
Identity seekers, who feel unique and different
People of this personality type tend to build their identities around their perception of themselves as being somehow different or unique; they are thus self-consciously individualistic. Fours tend to see their difference from others as being both a gift and a curse - a gift, because it sets them apart from those they perceive as being somehow "common," and a curse, as it so often seems to separate them from the simpler forms of happiness that others so readily seem to enjoy. Thus, Fours can manage to feel superior to others while also secretly harboring some degree of longing and envy. A feeling of being a member of the "true aristocracy" alternates with deep feelings of shame, and fears of somehow being deeply flawed or defective.
Fours are emotionally complex and highly sensitive. They long to be understood and appreciated for their authentic selves, but easily feel misunderstood and unappreciated. They have a tendency to withdraw in the face of a world that seems harsh or crude, and are often somewhat moody or temperamental. They are emotionally centered and spend much of their lives immersed in their internal mental landscapes, where they feel free to cultivate and analyse their feelings. A desire to manifest this internal world often leads Fours to an interest in the arts, and some do become actual artists. Whether artistic or not, however, most Fours are aesthetically sensitive and concerned with self-expression and self-revelation, whether it be in the clothes they wear or in the overall nature of their often idiosyncratic lifestyles.
Fours are somewhat melancholic by disposition, and under stress tend to lapse into depression. They also tend to be self-absorbed, even under the best of circumstances, but when unbalanced, easily give way to a self-indulgence which they perceive as being fully justified as a way to compensate for the general lack of pleasure they experience in their lives. Rather than look for practical solutions to their difficulties, Fours are prone to fantasizing about a savior who will rescue them from their unhappiness.
Intellectual Fours tend to mistakenly type themselves as Fives, and a heavy wing can certainly exacerbate this tendency. Fours however, unlike Fives, tend to be self-revealing and comfortable with emotional expression.
Enneagram Type 6 - The Loyalist
Conflicted between trust and distrust
People of this personality type essentially feel insecure, as though there is nothing quite steady enough to hold onto. At the core of the type Six personality is a kind of fear or anxiety. This anxiety has a very deep source and can manifest in a variety of different styles, making Sixes somewhat difficult to describe and to type. What all Sixes have in common however, is the fear rooted at the center of their personality, which manifests in worrying, and restless imaginings of everything that might go wrong. This tendency makes Sixes gifted at trouble shooting, but also robs the Six of much needed peace of mind and tends to deprive the personality of spontaneity. The essential anxiety at the core of the type Six fixation tends to permeate the personality with a sort of "defensive suspiciousness." Sixes don't trust easily; they are often ambivalent about others, until the person has absolutely proven herself, at which point they are likely to respond with steadfast loyalty. The loyalty of the Six is something of a two edged sword however, as Sixes are sometimes prone to stand by a friend, partner, job or cause even long after it is time to move on.
Sixes are generally looking for something or someone to believe in. This, combined with their general suspiciousness, gives rise to a complicated relationship to authority. The side of the Six which is looking for something to believe in, is often very susceptible to the temptation to turn authority over to an external source, whether it be in the form of an individual or a creed. But the Six's tendency towards distrust and suspicion works against any sort of faith in authority. Thus, two opposite pulls exist side by side in the personality of enneatype Six, and assume different proportions in different individuals, sometimes alternating within the same individual.
The truly confounding element when it comes to typing Sixes is that there are two fundamentally different strategies that Sixes adopt for dealing with fear. Some Sixes are basically phobic. Phobic Sixes are generally compliant, affiliative and cooperative. Other Sixes adopt the opposite strategy of dealing with fear, and become counterphobic, essentially taking a defiant stand against whatever they find threatening. This is the Six who takes on authority or who adopts a dare devil attitude towards physical danger. Counterphobic Sixes can be agressive and, rather than looking for authorities, can adopt a rebellious or anti-authoritarian demeanor. Counterphobic Sixes are often unaware of the fear that motivates their actions. In fact, Sixes in general, tend to be blind to the extent of their own anxiety. Because it is the constant back drop to all of their emotions, Sixes are frequently unaware of its existence, as they have nothing with which to contrast it.
Because Sixes so frequently fail to appreciate the extent of their own fear, they often mistype themselves. It is common for instance, for female Sixes to mistype as Twos, especially if they are identified with a helper role, but Sixes have a much more ambivalent attitude towards relationships than do Twos, who generally know exactly what they want. Sixes, failing to recognize their anxiety, can mistype as Nines, but Nines have the ability to relax and to trust in others, neither of which come easily to Sixes. Sixes can mistype as Fours, especially if they have artistic inclinations, but they lack the Four's self-absorption. They can mistype as Fives, especially if they are intellectual, as many Sixes are, but unlike Fives, Sixes tend to be practical. Finally, conterphobic Sixes can easily mistype as Eights, but they lack the Eight's self-certainty.
Want to know what personality type you are?
Check this out... http://www.eclecticenergies.com/enneagram/introduction.php
Friday, October 27, 2006
Friendship
:-) Friendship (-:
Many people will walk in and out of your life.
But only true friends will leave footprints in your heart.
To handle yourself, use your head;
To handle others, use your heart.
Friends
Anger is only one letter short of danger
If someone betrays you once, it is his fault;
If he betrays you twice, it is your fault.
Great minds discuss ideas;
Average minds discuss events;
Small minds discuss people.
He, who loses money, loses much;
He, who loses a friend, loses much more;
He, who loses faith, loses all.
Beautiful young people are accidents of nature,
But beautiful old people are works of art.
Learn from the mistakes of others
You can't live long enough to make them all
yourself.
Friends, you and me...
You brought another friend...
And then there were 3...
We started our group...
Our circle of friends...
And like that circle...
There is no beginning or end...
Yesterday is history.
Tomorrow is mystery.
Today is a gift.
That is why it is called the present.
Show your friends how much you care...
Sunday, October 22, 2006
XU Schedule
november 3-7 - upperclassmen enrollment
nov 8 - classes starts
prelim: dec 11-16
midterms: jan 22-27
semifinals: feb 19-24
finals: march 14-20
I AM PROUD TO BE AN ATENEAN!
My school may have a lot of short comings and downsides but those are outshined by several positive aspects. I love XU very much and I am proud to be an Atenean! Yes, I AM PROUD TO BE AN ATENEAN! Being an Atenean does not only require Competence! It requires Conscience and Commitment. And as a very intelligent mentor adds... Compassion (for student-nurses)! A true Atenean is a Man and Woman for others who serve under the light of Justice and Truth!
I don't want to prove or start a debate why
This essay is directed to a faculty of one school in Cagayan. We all are entitled to our opinions and beliefs and I believe in freedom of expression because this is of course our constitutional rights. But our rights end when we step on the rights of others. I did not want to eavesdrop on this faculty’s conversation with another person while riding a van to my hometown. Of course I didn’t listen in to their conversation but it can’t be help because this faculty’s voice was very loud and clear.
She was saying that her school (university) is better than XU and maybe all the other schools in Cagayan de Oro because of a lot of reasons, reasons of course that are very debatable and can be proven false. I can not help it. I can’t just sit around and listen to this faculty flame and defame my beloved school! I have to express my feelings! Gladly I was in a very pleasant mood so I was still calm and decided not to confront this faculty because I knew that it would just end up in a big mess.
My point is if you want to prove that your school is BETTER than the rest, begin by stating facts about your school. Do not compare and use other schools (especially XU) to prove that your school is a good school. Don’t destroy the name of other schools or the name of other people for that matter to gain fame or prestige. The only logical explanation why people use such low tactics to bring fame to their institution is either they are afraid of good competition or they really suck and have nothing to show the public.
Finally,
I don't read forwarded chain messages... why?
1. It's either spam
2. There's a curse or bad luck thing...
3. It's so impersonal
4. It's either plain stupid or too good to be true...
I'm sorry if I offend people who loves forwarding messages but please, try to reconsider your actions. You really want your friend to die? As in really... I have been deleting, ignoring, and practically ending the chain of nonesense! And I'm still alive and bad luck hasn't come to me... no, Samara didn't steal my soul, and my family are ok.
Please stop forwarding hurtful trash. Thank you. Peace!
Wednesday, October 18, 2006
What I Did Today
What I did today... wake up... eat... take a bath... watch detective conan... surf the net... eat lunch... surf the net... watch tv... snack... play legends of zelda... listen to music... and now currently blogging... exciting huh? Oh yes, don't forget to forget chatting and fighting someone who hates people with extensive vocabulary compared to hers. My day is really something...
Why can't I be like Ellen, a friend of mine, who has another recollection somewhere... She's been into so many recollections and retreats already that I won't wonder why she decided to enter the seminary but I could be wrong... hehehe...
Anyway nothing exciting is happening in my life, not that I am looking for excitement. I mean I want to do something productive for a change... like a job (not cleaning the house thank you, but it's a good idea though) or write a song or something... but I'm simply don't have any inspiration and my creative juices (if I have any) have already run out dry.
I feel like I don't know how to think aymore and I'm becoming very stupid by the second... I wonder how many brain cells have died already from doing nothing and thinking about nothing...
Tuesday, October 17, 2006
Pandora's Box! Great Music!!!
that Pandora's Box contained all evil in the world
but did you know that it also contains great
music? Nah, I'm lying...
Anyway, do you want to be your own DJ of your own
radio station? Then visit http://www.pandora.com
for great music and artists and songs of your
choosing.
This is the Music Genome Project! Want to discover
more artists and songs that fits your tastes? Then
visit Pandora! It's free!
On Mistakes
It is in these times of dullness for example that I have once again realized that I shouldn’t be afraid of making mistakes. Sure I have chosen the wrong choices and taken the wrong paths but this should not be a hindrance or even an excuse for failure. Yes, these mistakes will make us stronger and will serve as a good lesson as not to commit similar mistakes in the future.
Yes I have made dumb mistakes in my life that still makes me gag and look at myself with hate and disgust. But what’s done is done. I could never change the past. I have to live my life and continue my journey for the search of myself and my destiny.
I am happier with myself now and even content. Sure we all commit mistakes sometimes; it is these mistakes that prove that we are only human. What really matters is how we handle these mistakes. We can either allow our mistakes ruin our lives or we can use this negativity and transform it to something positive. As long as there is hope and strong will, nothing is impossible.
Don’t be afraid to commit mistakes… but a piece of advice. If you know it’s going to be a mistake, then why go through it right?
Friday, October 13, 2006
How is you?
I can excuse the people who haven't attended school but college students?!!! I once chatted online with someone from Cagayan de Oro who studies in one of the colleges here (he's not from Xavier University... thank goodness!) and God! He sure is dumb!
I'm sorry but I can't just help it. He has no excuse to have that bad grammar! Sure being able to speak good English will not help him become richer but at least it would give him pride that he's educated and is smart (linguistic IQ)!
This either states that the Philippine's education system is down the drain or today's youth posses low IQ and not to mention EQ.
Charness Char Char!
There were a lot of similarities that I found in all of the videos:
- Water - Almost all of the videos I had seen had something to do with water...
- Love - Love is the central theme of the songs... heartbreak songs to be exact... (does this mean that this generation's lovelife doesn't last forever?)
- Fashion - These Asian artists are sure fashionable... not to mention HOT!!! Hehehe...
Thursday, October 12, 2006
Abused Customer Service Agent
The link above will lead youto a taped conversation of a PLDT DSL subscriber and a PLDT Customer Service Agent. The customer is very hot headed and is putting all his frustration on the poor customer service agent. The customer service agent has just got enough of him and turned her microphone to mute and cursed at him.... well so she thought... because the very hot headed customer heard her curse and so he became very violent and made the poor customer agent day a living hell.
The agent just broke down crying...
In my opinion, the customer has all the right to be frustrated but he should also consider that the agent had nothing to do with the failure of the company. She just receives complaints and tries to convey this complaints to the department that would look to this. The customer has no right to attack these poor innocent customer agents because they already have a lot of inconsiderate people to talk to every day and they are just adding insult to injury.
The mental health of these workers are in critical condition. They constantly face anger, hate, pain, hurt, and a lot of verbal abuse from customers who fail to notice that these agents are also people with feelings. Sure, they're paid to receive all of the customer's complaints but the customers should know the limit as not to attack the agents.
The call centers may be one of the stressful jobs in the world. They constantly face apathy and dehumanization. How can you expect them to face another caller and greet them "good"morning when they just went through hell with a past arrogant caller?
We should be more sensitive of others feelings... this is what we should learn...
A Change of Perspective
for your flight, you notice a kiosk selling
shortbread cookies.
You buy a box, put them in your traveling bag and
then you patiently search for an available seat so
you can sit down and enjoy your cookies.
Finally you find a seat next to a gentleman. You
reach down into your traveling bag and pull out your
box of shortbread cookies.
As you do so, you notice that the gentleman starts
watching you intensely.
He stares as you open the box and his eyes follow
your hand as you pick up the cookie and bring it to
your mouth. Just then he reaches over and takes one
of your cookies from the box and eats it!
You're more than a little surprised at this.
Actually, you're at a loss for words. Not only does
he take one cookie, but he alternates with you.
For every one cookie you take, he takes one.
Now, what's your immediate impression of this guy?
Crazy? Greedy? He's got some nerve! Can you imagine
the words you might use to describe this man to your
associates back at the office? Meanwhile, you both
continue eating the cookies until there's just one
left.
To your surprise, the man reaches over and takes
it. But then he does something unexpected. He breaks
it in half, and gives half to you.
After he's finished with his half he gets up, and
> without a word, he leaves.
You think to yourself, "Did this really happen?"
You're left sitting there dumbfounded and still
hungry. So you go back to the kiosk and buy another
box of cookies. You then return to your seat and
begin opening your new box of cookies when you
glance down into your traveling bag.
Sitting there in your bag is your original box of
cookies -- still unopened. Only then did you realize
that when you reached down earlier, you had reached
into the other man's bag and grabbed his box of
cookies by mistake.
Now what do you think of the man? Generous?
Tolerant? You've just experienced a profound
paradigm shift. You're seeing things from a new
point of view.
Is it time to change your point of view?
Now, think of this story as it relates to your
life. Seeing things from a new point of view can be
very enlightening.
Think outside the box. Don't settle for the status
quo. Be open to suggestions
from: Xta
Tuesday, October 10, 2006
Detective Conan
CURRENTLYWATCHING...
So what is Detective Conan all about? Here's a short summary:
Shinichi Kudo is a high school student who, by using observation
and deduction, is good at solving mysteries. While investigating
one, he is caught by the criminals that he was watching and
forced to take an experimental drug. Leaving him for dead, the
criminals disappear. Instead of killing him, however, the drug
turns Shinichi into a little kid. To preserve the illusion of
his 'disappearance', Shinichi adopts a new name based on his
favorite author (Arthur Conan Doyle) and becomes Conan Edogawa.
Ran, his (actually Shinichi's) girlfriend takes this little boy
under her wing and brings him to her home. Conan now lives at a
detective agency run by Ran's father, but his mind is as keen as
ever and he continues to solve mysteries...always allowing Ran's
father to take all the credit. As far as everyone's concerned,
Conan is just a little kid anyway...even to Ran. This is
*extremely* frustrating to Conan since nobody will listen to a
'little boy'. In spite of this, Conan has a mission...to find
the criminals who did this to him and get the antidote to that
drug. This is, first and foremost, a mystery series. Each
episode contains a mystery that Conan has to solve. Unlike a lot
of "kids shows", the solutions aren't always obvious and form
enjoyable brain teasers. To date, I haven't solved any of the
mysteries before Conan yet! :-)
Oh well... that's life...
HunterXHunter: Greed Island
Here's a short summary so you people won't be Out of Place (OP):
Gon Freecs, a young boy that lives on a small island learns that his father who he doesn't remember is an extremely famous man and has become somewhat of an amazing hunter. Gon takes the hunter exam to seek out his amazing father, but on the way while teaming up with 3 other candidates, Kurapica, Leorio, and Killua, he learns that there is more to becoming a hunter and the challenges that he must face will be beyond his imaginations.
To further his quest to find his father, Gon Freecs and his friend Killua enter the world of Greed Island, a video game which Gon's father helped to create. Once inside the world of the game, Gon and Killua are faced with a combination of new allies and new enemies.
Blah, blah, blah... I urge you to watch it so you'llshare with me the ecstacy of HunterXHunter!!!
I'm the Worst Student Ever
The cool part about this is that the testwas incredibly easy! I'm so sure to pass it! Hehehe... let's just see the results... buhuhu... but honestly... if it wasan objective type of exam... I would have met a fate worst than of failing.... I would fail yes... but I would fail because I have nothing to answer at all... huhuhu...
I do have a Religious Studies exam tomorrow (the last of my exams...) but I still haven't studied and look at the time hehehe... I'm such an exemplary student... JOKE!!!
Oh well... I'll just think positive! Do you think I'm being TOO POSITIVE already that it already became NEGATIVE?! Hmm... the complexities of life...
Sunday, October 8, 2006
Ms. Angelee O. Jasareno
Ma'am Jasareno is perhaps the kindest and most loving and even motherly advisor that I had ever met in college. She's the only teacher in college that never aims to degrade your self-esteem but instead lifts you up on a pedestal so you can look at yourself with dignity and pride. No, Ma'am Jasareno is more than a mere teacher... she was a mentor...forming our young minds and forming our attitudes... we arereally empoweredunder her wings.
Ma'am Jasareno is a symbol of credibility and all out generosity... Buhuhu... I'm really getting so sentimental...
My last words for Ma'am Jasareno... she's so incredible! She's my role-model from now on hehehe!
On Homosexuality and Bisexuality...
Going back to the guy who I asked the do you think that you will go to hell question, I was deeply disturbed and even confused with what he said. He told me that it wasn't wrong to love so it wasn't a sin.
I was quite made aghast, yes, but he did quite have a point. The thing is that that kind of love is pointless. Why can't the homosexuals and bisexuals admit that they are only after easy sex that is why they engage in these deluded acts.
Homosexuals are incapable of loving and so I said... But according to a psychology study this statement is a big fallacy. Does that mean that homosexuals can love someone of the same sex?
This is quite a controversial topic. Why am I even talking about it? Hmm...