Monday, May 30, 2011

Rejection Sucks


This is how I feel right now... my heart feels heavy and I'm about to cry right now. I guess I should start getting used to rejections if I want to be dating people. Well let's do a post-conference on my short-lived romance:

Let's name this person K, to protect their privacy. K is a 23 year old Filipino, and we met on an app on the iPhone. What a great way to start a relationship right? Well we were chatting and I started liking K because K had a great sense of humor and K was smart. We then met one day and I was just swept off my feet. K wasn't really attractive but I was into K a lot. We spent the whole day and the conversation was fantastic. Well I thought so anyway, I don't know what K was thinking...

Well I just talked with K and K said that K was more into a friend and K didn't want to  mislead me or anyone else... which was kinda misleading because previously, K said K was in no rush to be in a relationship... but whatever. At least K told me head-on on what to expect.

My heart hurts right now, but I still am thinking of K. K says we could still be friends when I asked, but I have a feeling that this is actually the end of the road for us...well for me at least, since there was no us to begin with.

I'll be ok somehow, I'll be able to move on. I feel horrible and uhm... rejected? Things will be better?  I have no idea... I don't care anymore...

Saturday, May 28, 2011

There are days when I just feel like laying in bed and doing nothing, this is one of those days. Well I feel like this every day but once I get to work everything just falls into place and I get to do my actual job.

I actually love what I'm doing, it's just the act of trying to wake up that sucks. Well I prefer the day shift as compared to the evening shift anytime.

Well I guess I should head to work right now.

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Monday, May 23, 2011

Night Shifts Make Me Loopy

These past few days has been sort of exciting and new for me. I have been picking up night shifts, something that I would never ever would have done because I value my sleep a little bit too much.

Anyway, something interesting happened. I had a sudden realization that I love what I am doing. I remembered the Lady with the Lamp, Florence Nightingale, the founder of modern nursing. I'm no lady (that's for sure) but like her, I was dressed in white and I walked along the corridors of my hospital checking on my patients. Well it was more off doing a sleep monitoring sheet, but still... I was emulating a nursing characteristic of being observant.

On a personal note, night shifts on my unit could be very boring and repetitive since every one is asleep but I still find it enjoyable. The camaraderie that I have with the nurses and the other psychiatric aide is amazing.  

I just wish they give me more than an hour before they call me to work an 11 PM to 7 AM shift but I guess it can't be helped. Night shifts do make me loopy at times, making it more important that I know my limits since I do not want to work unable to think incoherently. I could pose as a danger to myself and my patients, this is why honesty and integrity is needed in nursing as well.

I am looking forward to more night shifts.