Wednesday, December 31, 2008

Money Is The Source of Problems


I really hate money. Money makes my life so miserable. I mean if I don't have money I can't buy the things I need and want. But if I have money, I worry how to keep that money from being wasted and from being used. You can't have too much or too less of money...

Earning money isn't that simple too. I have to work in a job where I do things that I never thought I would do like serving other people. Oh well when I become a nurse (or hopefully a doctor) in the future I will have to deal with people so being in customer service may be helpful in a way. It can help me strengthen my defenses against those unlikable and rude people by birth. I really hate my current job but I have to stick to it because I don't want to waste my free time by just staying at home and doing nothing.

I have to save money for university and I want to buy myself a car. But then things go crazy again. I have to make sure that I don't have too much money to be eligible for a Canadian Student Loan from the government and I can't have a car since it will add to my personal assets which will affect my eligibility for a student loan. I also have to put in mind that even if I save enough money for a car, I have to continue paying for gas and the car insurance so getting a car is not a great option if I plan on being a full time student. Oh well, guess I have to use the family car to get to my duty areas since my dad doesn't use it to go to work.

Sometimes, money can cause a strain in relationships. I have a friend from the Philippines who wanted to borrow 530 Canadian dollars (that's 20,000 Philippine Pesos) since my friend is having some financial difficulty. I have the money but I was having a hard time deciding whether I should lend my friend the money or not. It's a pretty huge sum (2 weeks pay) but if I don't help my friend in times of need then can I really call myself a friend? It's really hard when there are times you need money but your friends don't help you out because they are afraid of losing money. These are the times of hardship where you can tell your friends from the rest. I was also afraid of losing money. My brother doesn't pay me back the money he owes me and we live together, so what certainty do I have that my friend won't just run away with my money since my friend lives far away. Sure I can sue my friend or chase after my friend through legal means but then it would take time, effort, and more money. Plus it would lead to the end of our friendship, and I don't want that to happen.

But I lent my friend the money anyway because I place my trust and faith in this friend and that I want to be of help during this time of need. I just hope that I made the right decision because $530 is no laughing matter. I really hate worrying about money.

Monday, December 29, 2008

Why Are We So Different?

I really wonder why my brother and I are like opposite charges. Of course I'm the positive one and my brother is the negative. It's like we were raised by two different set of parents although it must be noted that we grew up in totally different environments.

I grew up in an environment where I was first mixed with "normal" Filipino kids and then suddenly sent to a new environment where the kids are privileged. By privileged I mean stinking rich with matching body guards and servants in uniforms. I was placed in an environment where I have to constantly prove my worth by making sure that I have several note worthy achievements. I was faced with high expectations from everyone and this pushed me to work harder. I had to live by myself while I studied in a high school in another city far away from home. I had to buy food from the grocery by myself, budget my allowance, and I had to do everything by myself because I lived alone. I was taught how to be independent and self-capable.

My brother on the other hand went to an average school, met average people, and my parents never expected anything from him, well except to pass and graduate that is. My brother is a spoiled brat and it is my parents who have to put extra effort in making sure he graduates from high school by doing his homework, influencing his teachers to make him pass, and they even have to waste hours trying to wake him up in the morning so that he can go to school. He is literally spoon fed and everything is given to him which never happened to me. Everything he needs is given to him and he never even have to ask for it.

Imagine asking your mom when you were a kid what a word meant and then she tells you to look it up in the dictionary while my brother on the other hand would never ask what that word means so my mom would be the one to tell him what that word meant so that he'll learn something. This is exactly how our situation is.

But I really blame my parents for how rotten my brother turned out to be. Since my parents allows him to do everything he wants, he is always out of the house and he smokes, drinks, and I presume that he does drugs too (he was already caught with marijuana and was almost expelled if it weren't for my parents). If he's not out of the house, he brings his equally pathetic and self-absorbed friends who are too busy trying to look cool and are too occupied with having fun that they forget that they should prepare for the future too and that whatever they have today is temporary.

I'm really sorry for my brother because I know that he's just wasting his life and his future. He was given an opportunity to study here in Canada and live a great life but he wastes it on his so called friends... but I shouldn't worry really, he's not my son. He's not my problem anymore. My parents aren't doing anything so why should I?

Sunday, December 28, 2008

Knowledge Could Save You

I recently went to a friend's house for a little gathering and it is there that I met his uncle who suffered a stroke. I was amazed by his story and his fight for his life. He was really blessed because even after being half-paralyzed due to his stroke and his open-heart surgery he is still doing well and is still active.

My friend's uncle was really lucky but not every one will be blessed like that. That is why everyone especially those at high risk of heart conditions should know more about how their heart works, how different heart complications will affect the heart's and the circulatory system's functions, and most important of all, how one can prevent acquiring these problems.

I believe that knowledge could save you and that's why I really recommend that everyone checks out heartlibrary.com because it is the website that has videos and contents about the anatomy of the heart and common heart problems. Real doctors who specializes in hearts and the circulation system informs you about the said topic with an easy to understand language. The website is also a great source for finding a doctor near you and other important tidbits of information.

So as the saying goes, Knowledge is Power!



Saturday, December 27, 2008

Boxing Day

Today was quite ok. It was quite busy but I'm kind of used to it. I already came back to work since my back has fully recovered and I didn't want to lose any more potential earnings.

It was quite sad that I wasn't able to come with my family shop today especially when it's Boxing Day. But what is Boxing Day really? Well it's a day when stores have these huge sales and discounts. The savings for these sales are so great that people will literally camp out and wait in line before the store opens. Boxing Day was supposed to be a day of goodwill to the less fortunate but guess it's more of an after Christmas shopping holiday.

But going to work today rather than going shopping was way better because I wasn't tempted to spend money (yes I'm a compulsive buyer) and bargain hunting at crowd-filled stores is not my idea of fun. Besides there isn't anything that I want to buy. Well I do want to buy that HP laptop that has a touch screen which could rotate 360 degrees but I kind of think that it's not worth it because I already have a laptop. I suddenly regret buying an overly expensive desktop which I don't like using anyway because I prefer using my laptop which I could carry around anywhere the house.

Anyway, at least my mom was happy today. She got to buy an Olympus Camera which has 8 Megapixels and is waterproof and shockproof for a very reasonable price too! And she also got an Altec Lansing speakers for her desktop for I think $20! That's a very sweet deal.

There are so many things I want to buy but then I realize that I don't really need them. So I'm quite thankful that I don't frequently go to malls and I don't use my credit card to buy stuff online anymore because I might do something hasty like buy an iPod Touch which I rarely use now. So Boxing Day is not a good holiday for me, but if I have a Million Dollar then you better move out of my way because I'm going shopping! Lol! So much for self restraint.

Friday, December 26, 2008

My Abnormality: My Right Hip

I went to see a Physical Therapist one day as recommended by my examining doctor. I was hoping that the Physical Therapist will give me a massage or some sort of treatment for my aching lower back pain which was actually improving already.

But instead of my anticipated massage (yes I love body massages) the doctor only gave me a thorough physical assessment which I really appreciated. I was even more amazed with the assessment of the doctor when he noticed that my right hip has a limited range of motion as compared to my left hip. So he concluded that this partial mobility of my right hip may have contributed to my frequent lower back pains. So you see, if my hip doesn't rotate well, it is my lower back which would need to twist and turn so my back is easily strained.

Well the doctor did also comment that for a 20 year old, my back isn't that strong yet so I was a bit ashamed of my unfit self and sedentary lifestyle. So I think I have already found one 2009 New Year's Resolution! I will make use of the Tony Horton's 10 Minute Exercise DVDs that I bought so I can get some exercise.

Monday, December 22, 2008

My Wish: Good Health

Christmas is fast approaching and I've got to admit that I'm not that excited really. Christmas isn't that exciting anymore here in Canada. It's my first white Christmas here in my new home but I kind of feel that there is something missing. And I bet that that something are my friends and other loved ones who I have left behind in the Philippines.

Before I was excited for Christmas because of the gifts and all but now that I can afford to buy whatever I want I have realized that Christmas here in Canada is very commercialized. It's only about gifts, the decorations, and the food. Back in the Philippines Christmas was more on the real reason for Christmas, the birth of Jesus Christ.

Anyway, the past few days I've been thinking of what I would want for Christmas and after being bed-ridden for 4 consecutive days, missing work and being in agonizing pain, because of a lower back injury I have realized that good health is a great Christmas gift. I used to laugh at older people wishing other old people good health for Christmas but now that I am in such pain I suddenly realized how important and priceless good health really is. I'm just glad that my condition is improving.

I have missed work for 4 days already, a huge loss of potential earnings for me, and I didn't even have the chance to study for my coming TOEFL iBT exam this January 2009. I know what you're thinking, what have I been doing all along while I was at home? But if you were in my place, you wouldn't have the chance to think of studying because of my nagging lower back pain when I sit, stand, lay down, walk or do anything. I couldn't even sleep because of the extreme pain. The only thing that could relieve my pain was a long hot bath or a hot shower but the pain would just come back again. But now I am able to sit and lay down flat on my back with out the pain anymore so this is really a great improvement!

I just have to show up tomorrow for my physical therapy and I'm sure that I'm going to be able to work soon and be fit enough to study and prepare for my TOEFL iBT exam. My holidays are starting to be brighter all along.

Thursday, December 18, 2008

A Heart That Bleeds

It never ceases to amaze me how some people can say and do nasty things to other people with out any hesitation. I wish I could do that too. I wish I could just hurt people and never regret it in the end but I just can't. I can't hurt other people nor do I want to hurt them. It makes me ashamed to say that whenever I do things like not saying hi to anyone I know or not being polite to anyone makes me suffer the next day.

I hate it how I tend to reflect upon my actions at the end of the day. I envy those that can just say what ever they want at the spur of the moment without any guilt what so ever. I hate it that I have a heart that bleeds so easily.

Maybe I'm just too week, letting myself be affected too much by the actions of other people. Maybe in this heartless and cold world I have to raise all my defenses if I want to save my self from emotional scars.

I'm just glad that I'm not alone whenever wrong has been done unto me because somehow I get to feel how my Savior was persecuted. I just think of Jesus Christ and I can just smile and in a way forgive.

I don't want to be a nasty person. I don't want to be someone so full of hate and negativity. I want to live my life peacefully.



Wednesday, December 17, 2008

Stupid Obstacles

There are several obstacles to my future right now. I had already gone through the pains of getting my school documents together and sending them from the Philippines to here in Canada and now I have to face new problems.

First I have to pass a Test of Spoken English. Well there was that English Proficiency Test too but I was able to meet that requirement because I studied for three years in Xavier University which was recognized by University of Alberta. Now I just have to pass that TOEFL iBT this coming January 10, 2009 and I'm all set. But this is better said than done because I have to get a speaking points of 26 from a range of 0-30. Who guessed that speaking English well will determine my future. People does say that my English is very good but sometimes I get my tongue twisted and I say awkward stuff.

But even if I pass that Test of Spoken English I still would have to deal with funding my education. I can get that student loan but I'm torn into two because I want to buy a car but if I buy a car then it would show that I'm not in financial need, which I am. But I guess that buying a car would be ok, I just have to buy a car less than $6,000 but what kind of car would I get with $6,000? If it has heating and it's automatic then I'm fine with that.

Life is sure full of complexities. Tomorrow I have to face my manager and tell her that I don't like it when they send me to other stores... let's see what happens tomorrow.

Monday, December 15, 2008

Ukay-Ukay in Canada

For all those who don't have even the faintest idea of what the word "Ukay-Ukay" means, worry not for I will enlighten you. Ukay-Ukay is a Filipino term for a sale of used clothes at very low prices. Ukay-ukay can be related to flea markets or any sale of second-items where by just pure luck you might find a very expensive designer item for half the price or even lesser.

Well I didn't believe my eyes when my parents drove to a Good Will shop. This Good Will shop has items that were donated by people who want to get rid of their old stuff and if you're lucky you might recieve the old expensive and designer items of a rich person.

I have to admit that some of the items were pretty decent. I got to buy some CD's of Alicia Keys and Craig David, an Anatomy and Physiology book, and some clothes. It was a bit hard to find anything my size since the people here are generally bigger in built. I did see some branded items but I also saw uniforms from coffee shops and other retail establishments. I never thought that people would be wearing work uniforms even if they don't work for that establishment. There were also some decorative items for the house, shoes, electronic items, and believe it or not, an exercise equipment which my dad happily bought, although I honestly would call it a piece of junk.

The Good Will shop is great for newcomers here in Canada but I still see Canadians (white people) buying stuff here so they too might also be looking for great bargains.

So the Good Will shop here in Canada is much like the Ukay-Ukay in the Philippines except that here in Canada you can oay with your Debit Card or Credit Card and there were lesser people.

The bottom line? Finding bargains and deals is a great opportunity for everyone so even if you live in a third world country or first world country, being able to save money and be able to buy some pretty neat stuff is a universal desire.

Sunday, December 14, 2008

Some Things Stay The Same

Who would have thought that moving here in Canada would save me from my stupid brother's friends?! I mean seriously?! They come in the middle of the night and just make my life a living hell. They make a mess and they make so much noise. My only relaxation period is disrupted by people who have no decency and who have no idea that there are actually people out there who considers their home as their private get away or sanctuary.

I am so pissed off right now. I'm even more pissed off than when that stupid customer at Tim Hortons threw his half empty cup of hot chocolate at the counter. Well I'll talk about this in another post.

But wait... I think it's quiet already... they must have already left thank God! Geez! These are the moments that I want to live in a totally separate house all by my self. When I can support myself you can be sure that I'll be leaving this crazy family. Well I really don't want to leave them but having to deal with living with my brother is very agonizing!

Thursday, December 11, 2008

I LOOOOVE YOGURT!

Yeah I love yogurt!!! I've been eating yogurt when I wake up and before I go to sleep because we have a lot in the fridge. I love the way yogurt tastes good and how it contributes to your health being a great source of protein, calcium, riboflavin and vitamin B 12.

Not only is it a good source of the said nutrients above, yogurt has active and living microorganisms that contributes to the body's natural defense and all. Yogurt isn't yogurt without these microorganisms.

Anyway, I love yogurt and all but I just found out that our yogurt is about to expire soon so I better start eating!

Traveling Nurse: A Goal for the Future

I have been thinking about my future and my career and I have already decided that there is no turning back for me and no more seconds thoughts because I am going to be a nurse for sure. But as I have been exposed to the clinical area as a student nurse I have realized that there are different areas in nursing and there are several career paths that I could take as a nurse.

I could be a clinical nurse specialist, nurse anesthetist, nurse administrator, or even a military nurse. But the nursing career option that is very enticing right now is to be a traveling nurse! Yup there are so many travel nursing jobs out there since there is really is a high demand for nurses.

Being a traveling nurse is great because not only do you get excellent pay and invaluable work experience in notable institutions, you get to travel all around the world too! Imagine, you can work in New York for example, and when winter comes and it becomes chilly you can travel and work in Hawaii!

I have to admit that I love traveling and being able to see all the sights and sounds of different cities and communities is better than having to live a life that is monotonous and just filled with daily routines.

I know that it's too early to really decide what I want to do in the future but becoming a traveling nurse is one of my top three career choices!



Wednesday, December 10, 2008

How To Lose A Friend in One Second

I have to be honest and admit that I have a very nasty temper. I rarely get mad but when I do I really lose my composure and calm. I'm like a bullet fired from a gun and nothing can stop me until I hit someone in the heart head on. But it's not unusual for me to blow up like that because I tend to keep all the frustrations, anger, and tension with in me so when I get the chance to rant and rave I will not stop until the scene is bloody red.

Fine I have an anger management issue but my co-worker can testify that I had a reason to be angry. Imagine, I was left all alone to take orders from so many people and then I make one tiny mistake of applying a discount to an order and then here comes my other co-worker telling me that I made a mistake yada yada in front of the customer who I served in a very scandalous manner. So if she wants a show in front of everyone then I'll give her one. I took her head on with her complaints and told her to just give that customer his order and I'll pay for the discount that I've applied and then she asks me why I'm mad?! Geez... seriously!

Well I could have just shut up and let the issue blow away like always but it's just that I was tired, grouchy, and I was sort of angry with them for leaving me in front while they just stayed at the back talking and all. I was angry because my job would be easier if they did their jobs too! Although she was assigned to do the dishes that day, there was absolutely no reason for her to just stay at the back when she's already done with her dishes. I was angry because she just ignores the fact that there is a big line up and she just passes by the customers and leave me to deal with them alone.

I was told by a co-worker that she only said those things she said because she cared about me adn she didn't want me to do that mistake again so that my manager and other supervisor won't be angry with me but the thing is she already played their part by shouting at me, "Why did you do this and bla bla bla!" She's always like that, blaming everyone except herself because she's always right and all perfect.

But guess what? Even though I feel bad for what happened and even if I did consider her as a friend, I am not hesitant to lose her as a friend because enough is enough. Friends don't leave their friends alone stressing out in a long line up and then just tell you "Why didn't you call us when it's busy?" Why? I'll tell you why. If you weren't staying at the back chatting and all I wouldn't have to call you right?

Geez... some people... SERIOUSLY!!!

Monday, December 8, 2008

My Future Is Brighter!!!

I am so happy today! I was thinking that my school documents were still flying around the world in some plane but when I tracked it down with the FedEx website I was thrilled to discover that the University of Alberta has finally received my papers and now I have a brighter future!

I'm very happy because I feel that finally everything is coming together great and if this keeps up I can finally be at ease and give out a sigh of relief. But I know that the challenge does not end here and having to re-study everything that I already learned and take the tests which were so hard to pass all over again is a huge challenge.

But I am prepared to take those challenges head on because I really want to finish my university and I want to finish my BS Nursing because this is who I know I can be and who I want to be someday.

Christmas Party

I am quite excited for this year's Christmas Party. Well I am excited for Christmas each and every year but this Christmas is very different from other past Christmas celebrations because this is our first Christmas here in Canada. In my 20 years of existence it is only now that we will finally have our very own white Christmas.

But what better ways to celebrate Christmas but with other people right? All Kagay-anons or Filipinos from Cagayan de Oro are going to have a get together and enjoy Christmas with each other's presence. Being with other Filipinos makes the Christmas less lonesome especially for those who miss their families and friends back in the Philippines.

I'm not in charge with the planning and logistics of the party but I do have great ideas for a Christmas party! Well the ideas are not originally mine. If you really want great ideas and if you're looking for inspiration then you might want to visit celebrations.com.

It is there that I found out about different Christmas party games, decorations, and food like Christmas candy recipes! What would Christmas be with out good old candy right?

I'm sure that even if I'm not into parties that much, sharing this info would be a great contribution to a successful and fun Christmas party!



Tuesday, December 2, 2008

Hold On

It's now 1:40 pm and there's a snow shower right now. I have to get to work soon but I've decided to do some quick blogging. Gosh the wind is so strong, I better put on more clothing on as well as something to place on my head because I just had a nasty "brain freeze" yesterday.

I'm amazed that I'm able to hold on until this day. My deadline for my university documents was yesterday but it will be sent from the Philippines today (hopefully). I just wish I get into university pretty soon.

Oh yeah I was fired from Quizno's because they've finally found a full time employee. I'm quite glad with their decision because I don't think my sanity and body can keep up with the added pressure. I just am a bit sad that my earnings would drop. I get a $400 paycheck with them for my part-time there and it's still a loss for me.

Anyway just want to share David Archuleta's video of Hold On. This is my most favorite track from his album. Most favorite because I love every song in his album and this one just happens to stand out. I love the way he sings and how he brings life into the song with out any of those voice manipulation and sound effects.

With out further delay here is David Archuleta singing Hold On:



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