Wednesday, December 31, 2008

Money Is The Source of Problems


I really hate money. Money makes my life so miserable. I mean if I don't have money I can't buy the things I need and want. But if I have money, I worry how to keep that money from being wasted and from being used. You can't have too much or too less of money...

Earning money isn't that simple too. I have to work in a job where I do things that I never thought I would do like serving other people. Oh well when I become a nurse (or hopefully a doctor) in the future I will have to deal with people so being in customer service may be helpful in a way. It can help me strengthen my defenses against those unlikable and rude people by birth. I really hate my current job but I have to stick to it because I don't want to waste my free time by just staying at home and doing nothing.

I have to save money for university and I want to buy myself a car. But then things go crazy again. I have to make sure that I don't have too much money to be eligible for a Canadian Student Loan from the government and I can't have a car since it will add to my personal assets which will affect my eligibility for a student loan. I also have to put in mind that even if I save enough money for a car, I have to continue paying for gas and the car insurance so getting a car is not a great option if I plan on being a full time student. Oh well, guess I have to use the family car to get to my duty areas since my dad doesn't use it to go to work.

Sometimes, money can cause a strain in relationships. I have a friend from the Philippines who wanted to borrow 530 Canadian dollars (that's 20,000 Philippine Pesos) since my friend is having some financial difficulty. I have the money but I was having a hard time deciding whether I should lend my friend the money or not. It's a pretty huge sum (2 weeks pay) but if I don't help my friend in times of need then can I really call myself a friend? It's really hard when there are times you need money but your friends don't help you out because they are afraid of losing money. These are the times of hardship where you can tell your friends from the rest. I was also afraid of losing money. My brother doesn't pay me back the money he owes me and we live together, so what certainty do I have that my friend won't just run away with my money since my friend lives far away. Sure I can sue my friend or chase after my friend through legal means but then it would take time, effort, and more money. Plus it would lead to the end of our friendship, and I don't want that to happen.

But I lent my friend the money anyway because I place my trust and faith in this friend and that I want to be of help during this time of need. I just hope that I made the right decision because $530 is no laughing matter. I really hate worrying about money.
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