Saturday, November 28, 2009

Materialistic and Insecurities

This topic isn't new to me and I think that I have blogged about this over and over again but there are some things that never get old because these topics are regular occurring events that needs to be reflected upon. But then again this is my blog so I can do and say what ever I want.

Yes I am materialistic I admit to that but the things that excites me or bring joy and fun into my boring life are things that I cherish and find importance. Materials or worldly things can become in a sense "important" or "irreplaceable" because certain emotions and memories are attached to them thus the birth of mementos and of course idols or icons.

But to me, the material things that makes me happy are the things that I have strive for. I worked my but to get these things so to be called materialistic or an air head is truly unfair (no one actually called me a materialistic person, just saying).

I admit that I wasn't born into a rich family or lived in a luxurious home. I wasn't poor but we were able to get by and live a decent and comfortable life. It's just unfortunate that I grew up in a community or environment where everyone was stinking rich! I hated it and really felt insecure when my classmates where picked up by new cars and personal body guards and I on the other hand had to wait for my always late father driving an outdated Toyota. I was always embarrassed with our car and I especially hate it when people look down at me.

So thus I grew up as a materialistic bastard who needs to gather expensive items to make a statement and protect my pride and social status. But don't get me wrong, I may want to look impressive but I know how to act appropriately around other people. When I deal with people who are less fortunate than me who are kind and respectful, I show them the same gratitude. I never make them feel like trash and I support and approve the idea that they are my equals. I actually am uncomfortable and sometimes ashamed that I have something that they will never ever have (not to sound self important). But there are people who are trash but act like they're something so I don't even bother conversing with them. If they do interact with me I follow the Golden Rule: Be sociable and I will be sociable but be a douche and I will show you the 7 levels of hell.

I really look up to the several blessed people I know and by blessed I mean wealthy and have an abundant source of income. The rich people I know and love to associate with are people who may live big but don't have big heads. I never associate myself with uber rich people with nasty personalities because I'll just feel insignificant and insecure but wait that's not the point.

The point I'm trying to make is that it doesn't hurt to dress nice and act civilized and refined as long as you don't step on other people. So if people hate you and call you an effing materialistic loser (again no one called me this) then it's their problem! It's not your fault that they're poor and miserable, you have everything you have right now because you worked hard for it and for someone to barge into your life and call you a fucking coffee stirrer (yes someone called me this and it really hit a nerve) is a reason to dress up to show that you are actually not a poor bastard just trying his best to live a decent life (not that being one is bad). If you don't act civilized and refined then people would judge you as a fucking contract worker but then contract workers would hate you because then you're a fucking show off!

Society sucks! This is why the rich and the poor never mix well together. This social stigma will never go away because of how people operate.

Damn, this post really ended badly.


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