Sunday, May 29, 2005

What Do I Want? What Do We Want?

Right now I am very confused. Before I had a clear view of my wants and the goals I wanted to achieve. But I am suddenly struck by the reality that I am in a void. I don’t know what I want in life anymore. Everything seems to be a monotonous re-run of what I call my life.
Before I had all of these things that I wanted and thought I wanted. Only to find out in the end that I never really wanted these and it would never really make me happy in the end. What would make me happy? What do I want? What do we all want in life?
I thought that getting what I want was easy. There are things that what ever I do, I will never get. There are things that I have sacrificed a lot for but seem pointless and worthless in the end.
I don’t know what I really want and really need. But don’t be fooled that what I mean is of things that this material world will offer. What I speak of is one that means more. I speak of the spiritual aspect of life, things that relates to the soul and true happiness. I don’t know. It all seems so blurry and all I can make of is snapshots of odd figures and signs.
What lies for me ahead? What is my destiny and what is my fate if all are pre-written? All is a chain of questions.

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