Inner Strength

I hate seeing it when the person I love the most is vulnerable. I hate to see my mom being meek when she's in public. I hate it because I know that she will be an easy target for people who are nasty and who loves to bring down others.

There are times that I wish I could be able to provide everything our family needs so that my mom won't have to work or go outside the house. There are times when I wish my mom had a stronger character... I mean she should be more confident enough to be able to speak louder and be more aggressive with dealing with people.

But I know that my mom has a different kind of strength that is not shown physically. And this is her inner strength. I know that she had gone through a lot to get us where we are now that's why I will always respect her for that strength to overcome all to reach her goal. But she reaches her goal with out harming or stepping down on others, and this is very respectable.

But maybe it's not my mom who lacks strength at all... maybe it's me. She has learned to accept who she is. I know that I accept myself for who I am but the question is have I completely accepted myself? Maybe not. I have to be honest. I hate going out of the house because I sometimes feel insecure. I feel inferior to the white people and that I feel like I have to prove my worth all the time. I want to get through this problem of mine. Maybe it's just because I'm still young and I need a little bit more of experience... well... we'll see.

Scared of Changes

In this world... the only thing that doesn't change is the fact that everything changes... nothing lasts forever...

Even if I know this fact it still strikes fear into me. I'm afraid of what may happen. But then if I don't know anything nothing will happen to me... I won't move forward. Change can be good. It may be good or it may be bad but change must happen for the world to move forward.

I'm tired of working for Tim Hortons and I'm tired of earning just $9.50 an hour. That's why I looked and searched for jobs... and guess what? A potential employer has contacted me and I had scheduled an interview with them. If I am accepted and hired I may work on a fixed schedule as a customer service representative working Mondays to Fridays at 1:30 pm to 9:30 pm. And the best part about it is that I might actually earn $20 an hour (well as they claimed). I know that it's too good to be true so I'm going to be cautious.

I do have fears with this big move... like what do I do? How do I quit my current job without burning bridges if Ace 1 Advertising and Acquisitions hire me? How do I get to my job since it's very far away. Will there still be buses available at 10 pm? Will I like my new job? Will I even be accepted?

Anyway if I'm unhappy with my current job and if I want to preserve my dignity and sanity well I better grab any good opportunity that appears right?

I'm the Baker

Yup you heard me life. I'm officially the baker... well for today anyway. Yup I'm a trainee baker but I was able to do some solo work back in the kitchen.

I actually love being the baker because I don't have to serve any customers face to face. I don't like dealing with people... but then how can I be a nurse huh? But being a nurse is quite better than being a food store employee because most stupid people think that just because we are low earners we are uneducated.

Anyway on with my rantings. One thing that I don't like about baking is the cleaning part (aside from the going into the freezer to get stuff). Yup I hate cleaning the oven because the oven cleaner is so noxious and it's too bad that my employers don't even bother providing us with gloves and masks.

Anyway I told my manager that I couldn't work mornings anymore because I had a second part-time job as a call center agent (which of course is a lie). Good thing that it was my good manager that was working and not my bad manager who we Pinoys call Jessebel which I don't know why... maybe I'll ask tomorrow.

Well that's all for my updates today as a hard working person living out my life and slowly dying... I'm so dull sorry but that's plain old me. Simple and boring... peace out!

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Photo credits to ciaprochef.com

Identifying the Unknown

Do you hate it when there are unknown callers to your home? Well you do have the caller ID but then it's not that good because most annoying and sometimes harassing phone callers have the ability to cloak their names.

I had never experienced telemarketing this invasive way back home in the Philippines. Heck, we didn't have telemarketing in the Philippines calling and disturbing us in the comfort of our home. What's worst is if you answer the phone and you just hear a recording.

That is why it would be great to be able to trace a phone number and call up that caller saying I know who you are and where you live. Stop calling me or I'll take legal actions against you.

Yup you can have the power to know who called you even if their numbers are unlisted and you can be sure that it is 100% confidential. They won't know that you know who they are. With reverse phone lookups offered by phoneinfotracer.com you can trace a phone number and even know the exact location of the caller even if they are using a cellphone. Isn't that great? It's like having your own personal FBI agent tracing unknown callers for you.