Wednesday, November 26, 2008

Missing The Philippines

I can't help but miss my old life in the Philippines. As an old saying goes, you'd never know what you have unless you lost it. Now that I live in Canada this saying is pretty much applicable to me.

There are times that I can't help but think that moving to Canada was a HUGE mistake. It feels like my life was a train going smoothly through a carefully laid track to success and happiness but all of the sudden, immigrating to Canada derailed my life and now it's a total mess and disaster... I don't know if I'd ever get my life back on track.

I never knew how happy I was being with my friends... they made me very happy and they made me feel that I was actually alive. They've played a role in helping me survive each and every single day. Studying was not easy but I just realized that I lived such a luxurious life. Back in the Philippines, I never worked a sweat and I was given money to spend. and now, I have to work to get what I want and to save up for my future. I was studying in one of the top universities in the Philippines and now I have a slim chance of getting into a good college next year (I can get into a University but I don't want to wait longer). I never did try my best in getting good grades and getting through every single day but now I have to give it my all just to prevent myself from going insane.

Back in the Philippines I had a life, but now I have nothing... well I do have my family but I feel that there is something missing in me...

I used to be happy and glad to be here leaving poverty and hardship behind but now I want to go back and be a middle class again because here we're just a low-earning family. We're not considered poor but we don't have a car and house that we can call our own yet so life can be pretty difficult.

But as usual... I am a Filipino, and I am a survivor...

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