Wednesday, March 25, 2009

I've Hit Rockbottom...

I used to be at the top of my game. I was one of the top students in one of the best university in the Philippines, I pass and do great in everything to do, I was even considered as a leader and as a role model... I had goals and dreams, I had the right stuff and the tools of the trade to succeed!

But look at me now, I'm out of school, I work at a fastfood restaurant throwing garbage, serving people who looks down at me thinking I'm a highschool dropout Filipino contract worker... I used to be part of the elite social class and now I'm nothing... quite a humbling experience really.

Although my family isn't poor, we do have a car, food on the table, and a roof above our heads, I still feel incompetent and completely useless because it seems that several years of my life has been wasted on being a good student with high grades. I took a pass on going out with friends and having fun because I wanted to be serious and diligent on my studies because I was career oriented. But now all those sleepless nights and sacrifice doesn't mean a thing because in Canada, education from other countries especially third world countries is sub par which I think is unfair and totally ridiculous in a way.

But here I am a total loser in a country where Filipinos are looked down upon because they think we are uneducated poor people. I hate this country, I never wanted to be here in the first place... I was sucked out from my very successful life into this pit of self pity and despair.

But I won't give up! I will take the wheel and take control of my life. I'll show those people that I am not someone to be looked down upon. But seriously, if I don't start school this year, I will completely lose it and go on a rampage.

I had a great life, now look how I am today. It infuriates me!

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