Assisting in a Pap Smear

Last November 30, I went down to Cagayan de Oro because I was one of the eight endorsed by our clinical instructor's to assist in the Pap Smear at the Mother's House (An extension of German Doctors). I was quite excited and I have to admit that I had a bit of hepatomegalee episode (enlargement of the liver or bukad atay/burst of ego). Yeah it really felt good to be recognized because of your skills (char!).

I really thought that I could really experience a pap smear procedure but it was unfortunate that not one patient showed up. But at least I was able to take one client's vital signs (which I think I did ok). It was very fun though! I had fun talking to my team mates and it was cool to be able to share things with them.

We weren't able to gain some experience but we still have some incentives... incentives that I can't talk about because it would be a breach of secrecy. Hehehe...

Hello World

I haven't been blogging lately. There can only be three reasons...

1. I'm too busy.
2. I'm lazy.
3. I don't have anything worth blogging.

It's really more of the second reason... hehehe...

Anyway I really like reading other people's blog because it really gives me a glimpse of who they really are. It is really interesting. Anyway, I'll post a couple of things now.

A Letter of Complaint

Good day and peace in Christ!

I just want to report an incident that occurred on November 27, 2006, that I thought was really disturbing and it had really affected me so much that it moved me to write this letter. Some may believe that this is only something really irrelevant and does not need to be pondered upon, but I think that this issue is quite important. This issue shakes my image of a nursing-student who has principles, good conduct, and not to mention the sensitivity to other people’s rights. This incident has tarnished this image that I had planted in my system.

My classmates and I were patiently waiting in a long line to claim our breakage refund. It was very hot and people were being rude and were squeezing in front of the line. My classmates were trying to reprimand these students and told them to get back in line at the back. We were trying to bring order to this chaos when all of the sudden we saw (Hidden for Privacy Reasons) leading their group of friends and casually made their way at the front and asked someone to get their ID’s so that they could have a “reservation” at the front. (Hidden) even went to (Hidden) and told her not to get in line at front because this is unfair to everyone but she replied “Ok lang na uy.” After all the things we said they still went ahead and got in line at front not even having any guilt at all that they were being unfair and not to mention disrespectful of the other people that patiently waited in line. I know that this is not worth mentioning at all but what shocked me the most is that these people are our leaders. We look up to (Hidden), our (Hidden), and (Hidden), the (Hidden), as our role-models. We were really disappointed at knowing that our leaders who supposedly knew what is right from wrong did this, and to think that it was their duties as an Atenean leader to do something about this situation. I even heard from someone that (Hidden) even boasted to someone that she already got her breakage money first than anyone else. We just looked at them from the back of the line hoping that they would feel some remorse but they just smiled at us.

I know that courtesy is one of the important things that the XU College of Nursing is trying to teach us. And XU is trying to form men and women for others but this scenario is quite disturbing and is contradictory. I am quite concerned that if the other (Hidden) students saw this then they would lose their respect for these leaders and maybe even follow in their footsteps. I do not want any conflict ma’am; I just want someone else in authority to make them aware of their actions because they don’t seem to listen to us.

I am really down right now. I really thought that they knew what is right. I promise that I won't vote for them any more and I hope that someone else deserving takes their place so that the rest of the student body gets to have leaders who are good influences on them...

My New Boarding House

I remembered the day when I first went away from the very first boarding house I went home to. And now for the second time, I'm moving once again from my other so-called new home. But I did not move to escape the people I hate, I had to move because I had to be able to concentrate to be able to study. I liked those people but I had to go away so that I can study.

Don't get me wrong, I like my boardmates and landlady but I had to move for the best. Well, at least best for me. It's just too noisy for me to study... But now that I had moved away and have already settled in to my new found second home I suddenly realize that maybe I just blamed the noise for not being able to study. Maybe it's just because of me that I'm not able to study. I'm just too lazy and I don't know why. Now that I have already ran out of reasons and maybe even excuses I am now finally to look at my mistakes for the one hundred millionth time...

Oh well, here comes a new page in my journey called life.

On Relationships

Relationships

I have been looking at my past and remembering my past relationships. If you would watch my life story with me you could really say that my life sure is sure unstable. I had a lot of past relationships if you could call them relationships. If I did have a real relationship, it was only with this one girl who I hold dear to me and respect until now. The rest would be categorized in the unmentionables because I am ashamed to let any one know that I ever had anything to do with them.

I don’t know what I really want. I feel that I have been writing about this frequently. I keep on ranting about being lonely and empty. Maybe I was so desperate to be with someone that I make so stupid mistakes and end up with those pathetic people. Maybe I’m pathetic myself because I fell for them. Yes I did made mistakes but at least I’ve learned from them and I didn’t have to go through five or more relationships to learn my mistakes. I have learned to be happy with my self first to be happy with any one else. The saying “You complete me” is a total crap. Only broken people get together with other broken people and they both end up destroying both their lives. And that is more pathetic don’t you think?

I don’t really understand people and the concept of relationships. Is it pure hormonal instinct that people get together so that they can procreate? Don’t forget the other probable reason: survival. Don’t get me wrong but this is the tendency and even trend that I see. People only get attracted to people who are good looking, rich, famous, or people that would raise their status in society. I don’t really believe that love really exists between these types of people. This “feeling” that these people have is a safety belt that they have because the relationship is either mutually rewarding or beneficial for one.

When I was in high school this parent of someone I know asked me if I already had a girlfriend. I said no. And he was so shocked and even told me that I should really get one. I was so infuriated because what does having a girlfriend have to do anything with being a high school student? I never knew that it was a requirement to have a girlfriend to have good grades and graduate. What is really in relationships? Love? I don’t think so. Let’s face it. Let’s stop believing that love stories that we see in the movies are possible.

The motives for a relationship that I see are the following:

1. Sex

2. Popularity

3. Security

4. Other beneficial factors

But I wish that I could really be proven wrong because I world with this kind of people is a world that I don’t ever want to love in. There is more to relationships than what I said above, if only people would agree with me.

Losing Something

It's very frustrating when you lose something. It's more frustrating when you lose something very important and that you know that someone else was at fault. I hate finding things. It really stresses me out when I am faced with a situation where I don't know anything. Losing something feels like losing a part of you. When I lose something I feel so weak and so afraid.

There are times that I cannot take the pressure anymore that I burst into tears. Some may find this weird or even funny but it's very hard to lose something which you have kept safe until someone so stupid takes it away and misplaces it. I really hate it.

Who am I?

These are my personalities/characrteristics... I'm a Type 4 & 6 in the Enneagram...

Enneagram Type 4 - The Individualist

Identity seekers, who feel unique and different

People of this personality type tend to build their identities around their perception of themselves as being somehow different or unique; they are thus self-consciously individualistic. Fours tend to see their difference from others as being both a gift and a curse - a gift, because it sets them apart from those they perceive as being somehow "common," and a curse, as it so often seems to separate them from the simpler forms of happiness that others so readily seem to enjoy. Thus, Fours can manage to feel superior to others while also secretly harboring some degree of longing and envy. A feeling of being a member of the "true aristocracy" alternates with deep feelings of shame, and fears of somehow being deeply flawed or defective.

Fours are emotionally complex and highly sensitive. They long to be understood and appreciated for their authentic selves, but easily feel misunderstood and unappreciated. They have a tendency to withdraw in the face of a world that seems harsh or crude, and are often somewhat moody or temperamental. They are emotionally centered and spend much of their lives immersed in their internal mental landscapes, where they feel free to cultivate and analyse their feelings. A desire to manifest this internal world often leads Fours to an interest in the arts, and some do become actual artists. Whether artistic or not, however, most Fours are aesthetically sensitive and concerned with self-expression and self-revelation, whether it be in the clothes they wear or in the overall nature of their often idiosyncratic lifestyles.

Fours are somewhat melancholic by disposition, and under stress tend to lapse into depression. They also tend to be self-absorbed, even under the best of circumstances, but when unbalanced, easily give way to a self-indulgence which they perceive as being fully justified as a way to compensate for the general lack of pleasure they experience in their lives. Rather than look for practical solutions to their difficulties, Fours are prone to fantasizing about a savior who will rescue them from their unhappiness.

Intellectual Fours tend to mistakenly type themselves as Fives, and a heavy wing can certainly exacerbate this tendency. Fours however, unlike Fives, tend to be self-revealing and comfortable with emotional expression.

Enneagram Type 6 - The Loyalist

Conflicted between trust and distrust

People of this personality type essentially feel insecure, as though there is nothing quite steady enough to hold onto. At the core of the type Six personality is a kind of fear or anxiety. This anxiety has a very deep source and can manifest in a variety of different styles, making Sixes somewhat difficult to describe and to type. What all Sixes have in common however, is the fear rooted at the center of their personality, which manifests in worrying, and restless imaginings of everything that might go wrong. This tendency makes Sixes gifted at trouble shooting, but also robs the Six of much needed peace of mind and tends to deprive the personality of spontaneity. The essential anxiety at the core of the type Six fixation tends to permeate the personality with a sort of "defensive suspiciousness." Sixes don't trust easily; they are often ambivalent about others, until the person has absolutely proven herself, at which point they are likely to respond with steadfast loyalty. The loyalty of the Six is something of a two edged sword however, as Sixes are sometimes prone to stand by a friend, partner, job or cause even long after it is time to move on.

Sixes are generally looking for something or someone to believe in. This, combined with their general suspiciousness, gives rise to a complicated relationship to authority. The side of the Six which is looking for something to believe in, is often very susceptible to the temptation to turn authority over to an external source, whether it be in the form of an individual or a creed. But the Six's tendency towards distrust and suspicion works against any sort of faith in authority. Thus, two opposite pulls exist side by side in the personality of enneatype Six, and assume different proportions in different individuals, sometimes alternating within the same individual.

The truly confounding element when it comes to typing Sixes is that there are two fundamentally different strategies that Sixes adopt for dealing with fear. Some Sixes are basically phobic. Phobic Sixes are generally compliant, affiliative and cooperative. Other Sixes adopt the opposite strategy of dealing with fear, and become counterphobic, essentially taking a defiant stand against whatever they find threatening. This is the Six who takes on authority or who adopts a dare devil attitude towards physical danger. Counterphobic Sixes can be agressive and, rather than looking for authorities, can adopt a rebellious or anti-authoritarian demeanor. Counterphobic Sixes are often unaware of the fear that motivates their actions. In fact, Sixes in general, tend to be blind to the extent of their own anxiety. Because it is the constant back drop to all of their emotions, Sixes are frequently unaware of its existence, as they have nothing with which to contrast it.

Because Sixes so frequently fail to appreciate the extent of their own fear, they often mistype themselves. It is common for instance, for female Sixes to mistype as Twos, especially if they are identified with a helper role, but Sixes have a much more ambivalent attitude towards relationships than do Twos, who generally know exactly what they want. Sixes, failing to recognize their anxiety, can mistype as Nines, but Nines have the ability to relax and to trust in others, neither of which come easily to Sixes. Sixes can mistype as Fours, especially if they have artistic inclinations, but they lack the Four's self-absorption. They can mistype as Fives, especially if they are intellectual, as many Sixes are, but unlike Fives, Sixes tend to be practical. Finally, conterphobic Sixes can easily mistype as Eights, but they lack the Eight's self-certainty.

Want to know what personality type you are?

Check this out... http://www.eclecticenergies.com/enneagram/introduction.php

:-) Friendship (-:

Many people will walk in and out of your life.
But only true friends will leave footprints in your heart.
To handle yourself, use your head;
To handle others, use your heart.

Friends

Anger is only one letter short of danger
If someone betrays you once, it is his fault;
If he betrays you twice, it is your fault.

Great minds discuss ideas;
Average minds discuss events;
Small minds discuss people.

He, who loses money, loses much;
He, who loses a friend, loses much more;
He, who loses faith, loses all.

Beautiful young people are accidents of nature,
But beautiful old people are works of art.

Learn from the mistakes of others
You can't live long enough to make them all
yourself.

Friends, you and me...
You brought another friend...
And then there were 3...
We started our group...
Our circle of friends...
And like that circle...
There is no beginning or end...

Yesterday is history.
Tomorrow is mystery.
Today is a gift.
That is why it is called the present.

Show your friends how much you care...

XU Schedule

Oct 30-31, 2006 -- freshmen enrollment

november 3-7 - upperclassmen enrollment

nov 8 - classes starts

prelim: dec 11-16

midterms: jan 22-27

semifinals: feb 19-24

finals: march 14-20

I AM PROUD TO BE AN ATENEAN!

My school may have a lot of short comings and downsides but those are outshined by several positive aspects. I love XU very much and I am proud to be an Atenean! Yes, I AM PROUD TO BE AN ATENEAN! Being an Atenean does not only require Competence! It requires Conscience and Commitment. And as a very intelligent mentor adds... Compassion (for student-nurses)! A true Atenean is a Man and Woman for others who serve under the light of Justice and Truth!

I don't want to prove or start a debate why Xavier University - Ateneo de Cagayan is one of the most prominent schools in Cagayan de Oro. My purpose in writing this is to express my hurt and dismay.

This essay is directed to a faculty of one school in Cagayan. We all are entitled to our opinions and beliefs and I believe in freedom of expression because this is of course our constitutional rights. But our rights end when we step on the rights of others. I did not want to eavesdrop on this faculty’s conversation with another person while riding a van to my hometown. Of course I didn’t listen in to their conversation but it can’t be help because this faculty’s voice was very loud and clear.

She was saying that her school (university) is better than XU and maybe all the other schools in Cagayan de Oro because of a lot of reasons, reasons of course that are very debatable and can be proven false. I can not help it. I can’t just sit around and listen to this faculty flame and defame my beloved school! I have to express my feelings! Gladly I was in a very pleasant mood so I was still calm and decided not to confront this faculty because I knew that it would just end up in a big mess.

My point is if you want to prove that your school is BETTER than the rest, begin by stating facts about your school. Do not compare and use other schools (especially XU) to prove that your school is a good school. Don’t destroy the name of other schools or the name of other people for that matter to gain fame or prestige. The only logical explanation why people use such low tactics to bring fame to their institution is either they are afraid of good competition or they really suck and have nothing to show the public.

Finally, Xavier University – Ateneo de Cagayan is already a historical landmark in Cagayan de Oro and it has already yielded exceptional Atenean alumni who excel in various fields in various places around the world. This ladies and gentlemen is a FACT! The reason why I don’t have to start a debate or prove anything is because everyone knows that XU is an exceptional school. XU does not need to advertise or promote because XU is already a well recognized school in Cagayan de Oro, in the Philippines, and in the world. This is a fact. And as they say in business, the only reason why a product is being promoted is either it is new or it is not patronized by the public.

I don't read forwarded chain messages... why?

I don't read forwarded chain messages... why?

1. It's either spam
2. There's a curse or bad luck thing...
3. It's so impersonal
4. It's either plain stupid or too good to be true...

I'm sorry if I offend people who loves forwarding messages but please, try to reconsider your actions. You really want your friend to die? As in really... I have been deleting, ignoring, and practically ending the chain of nonesense! And I'm still alive and bad luck hasn't come to me... no, Samara didn't steal my soul, and my family are ok.

Please stop forwarding hurtful trash. Thank you. Peace!

What I Did Today

I wish I could say that I have a very productive sem-break but I don't. Infact, I haven't been doing anything special for the past days ever since I was on vacation. As usual, I'mbored to death and am already begging to go back to school... but I won't repeat what I say every time I'm on school breaks...

What I did today... wake up... eat... take a bath... watch detective conan... surf the net... eat lunch... surf the net... watch tv... snack... play legends of zelda... listen to music... and now currently blogging... exciting huh? Oh yes, don't forget to forget chatting and fighting someone who hates people with extensive vocabulary compared to hers. My day is really something...

Why can't I be like Ellen, a friend of mine, who has another recollection somewhere... She's been into so many recollections and retreats already that I won't wonder why she decided to enter the seminary but I could be wrong... hehehe...

Anyway nothing exciting is happening in my life, not that I am looking for excitement. I mean I want to do something productive for a change... like a job (not cleaning the house thank you, but it's a good idea though) or write a song or something... but I'm simply don't have any inspiration and my creative juices (if I have any) have already run out dry.

I feel like I don't know how to think aymore and I'm becoming very stupid by the second... I wonder how many brain cells have died already from doing nothing and thinking about nothing...

Pandora's Box! Great Music!!!

Guys I just want to share Pandora's Box. They said
that Pandora's Box contained all evil in the world
but did you know that it also contains great
music? Nah, I'm lying...

Anyway, do you want to be your own DJ of your own
radio station? Then visit http://www.pandora.com
for great music and artists and songs of your
choosing.

This is the Music Genome Project! Want to discover
more artists and songs that fits your tastes? Then
visit Pandora! It's free!

On Mistakes

We have to admit that doing nothing can sometimes be very productive. It gives you time to reflect and for some, this is the perfect opportunity to let all the creative juices flow. As for me, it is in these times of dullness and stillness that I suddenly get hit by great ideas and realizations.

It is in these times of dullness for example that I have once again realized that I shouldn’t be afraid of making mistakes. Sure I have chosen the wrong choices and taken the wrong paths but this should not be a hindrance or even an excuse for failure. Yes, these mistakes will make us stronger and will serve as a good lesson as not to commit similar mistakes in the future.

Yes I have made dumb mistakes in my life that still makes me gag and look at myself with hate and disgust. But what’s done is done. I could never change the past. I have to live my life and continue my journey for the search of myself and my destiny.

I am happier with myself now and even content. Sure we all commit mistakes sometimes; it is these mistakes that prove that we are only human. What really matters is how we handle these mistakes. We can either allow our mistakes ruin our lives or we can use this negativity and transform it to something positive. As long as there is hope and strong will, nothing is impossible.

Don’t be afraid to commit mistakes… but a piece of advice. If you know it’s going to be a mistake, then why go through it right?

How is you?

"Hay ebryone, how is you?"

Everytime we hear someone who speaks bamboo-English (bad Englsih) we can't help but laugh... But I don't find anything to laugh about with this fact. The fact is Filipinos are known for their bad English and illeteracy... we have the so called "masa" or the masses (poor people) who aren't educated that contributes to the high illiteracy rate and not to mention the poverty count.

I can excuse the people who haven't attended school but college students?!!! I once chatted online with someone from Cagayan de Oro who studies in one of the colleges here (he's not from Xavier University... thank goodness!) and God! He sure is dumb!

I'm sorry but I can't just help it. He has no excuse to have that bad grammar! Sure being able to speak good English will not help him become richer but at least it would give him pride that he's educated and is smart (linguistic IQ)!

This either states that the Philippine's education system is down the drain or today's youth posses low IQ and not to mention EQ.

Charness Char Char!

I've been watching MTV China (or was it MTV Asia) awhile ago and I really enjoyed it. The songs were in Chinese so I didn't understand anything but I really felt their message. The scenarios were also excellent... It was like watching a mini-movie and it was very cool!

There were a lot of similarities that I found in all of the videos:

1. Water - Almost all of the videos I had seen had something to do with water...
2. Love - Love is the central theme of the songs... heartbreak songs to be exact... (does this mean that this generation's lovelife doesn't last forever?)
3. Fashion - These Asian artists are sure fashionable... not to mention HOT!!! Hehehe...

But watching the movies made me feel good... It sort of helped me realize that I'm still searching forwho I really am... and I'm not alone...

Abused Customer Service Agent

http://www.zshare.net/audio/pldt-complaint-wav.html

The link above will lead youto a taped conversation of a PLDT DSL subscriber and a PLDT Customer Service Agent. The customer is very hot headed and is putting all his frustration on the poor customer service agent. The customer service agent has just got enough of him and turned her microphone to mute and cursed at him.... well so she thought... because the very hot headed customer heard her curse and so he became very violent and made the poor customer agent day a living hell.

The agent just broke down crying...

In my opinion, the customer has all the right to be frustrated but he should also consider that the agent had nothing to do with the failure of the company. She just receives complaints and tries to convey this complaints to the department that would look to this. The customer has no right to attack these poor innocent customer agents because they already have a lot of inconsiderate people to talk to every day and they are just adding insult to injury.

The mental health of these workers are in critical condition. They constantly face anger, hate, pain, hurt, and a lot of verbal abuse from customers who fail to notice that these agents are also people with feelings. Sure, they're paid to receive all of the customer's complaints but the customers should know the limit as not to attack the agents.

The call centers may be one of the stressful jobs in the world. They constantly face apathy and dehumanization. How can you expect them to face another caller and greet them "good"morning when they just went through hell with a past arrogant caller?

We should be more sensitive of others feelings... this is what we should learn...

A Change of Perspective

Imagine you're in a Airport. While you're waiting
for your flight, you notice a kiosk selling
shortbread cookies.
You buy a box, put them in your traveling bag and
then you patiently search for an available seat so
you can sit down and enjoy your cookies.
Finally you find a seat next to a gentleman. You
reach down into your traveling bag and pull out your
box of shortbread cookies.
As you do so, you notice that the gentleman starts
watching you intensely.
He stares as you open the box and his eyes follow
your hand as you pick up the cookie and bring it to
your mouth. Just then he reaches over and takes one
of your cookies from the box and eats it!
You're more than a little surprised at this.
Actually, you're at a loss for words. Not only does
he take one cookie, but he alternates with you.
For every one cookie you take, he takes one.
Now, what's your immediate impression of this guy?
Crazy? Greedy? He's got some nerve! Can you imagine
the words you might use to describe this man to your
associates back at the office? Meanwhile, you both
continue eating the cookies until there's just one
left.
To your surprise, the man reaches over and takes
it. But then he does something unexpected. He breaks
it in half, and gives half to you.
After he's finished with his half he gets up, and
> without a word, he leaves.
You think to yourself, "Did this really happen?"
You're left sitting there dumbfounded and still
hungry. So you go back to the kiosk and buy another
box of cookies. You then return to your seat and
begin opening your new box of cookies when you
glance down into your traveling bag.
Sitting there in your bag is your original box of
cookies -- still unopened. Only then did you realize
that when you reached down earlier, you had reached
into the other man's bag and grabbed his box of
cookies by mistake.
Now what do you think of the man? Generous?
Tolerant? You've just experienced a profound
paradigm shift. You're seeing things from a new
point of view.
Is it time to change your point of view?
Now, think of this story as it relates to your
life. Seeing things from a new point of view can be
very enlightening.
Think outside the box. Don't settle for the status
quo. Be open to suggestions

from: Xta

Detective Conan

CURRENTLYWATCHING...

I haven't started watching this one...It has 81 episodes and I am running out of memory in my harddrive!!! Stupid computer!!! I'm erasing asmuch trash as Ican so that I can accomodate this beauty in to my computer... I have toreturn the DVD tomorrow to once again...the great Jade. Well I party own it...we both do but I'll allow her to keep it because she unselfishly lent me her HunterXHunter: Greed Island DVD (which I haven't returned yet... hehehe...).

So what is Detective Conan all about? Here's a short summary:

Shinichi Kudo is a high school student who, by using observation
and deduction, is good at solving mysteries. While investigating
one, he is caught by the criminals that he was watching and    
forced to take an experimental drug.  Leaving him for dead, the
criminals disappear.  Instead of killing him, however,  the drug
turns Shinichi into a little kid.  To preserve the illusion of 
his 'disappearance', Shinichi adopts a new name based on his   
favorite author (Arthur Conan Doyle) and becomes Conan Edogawa.
Ran, his (actually Shinichi's) girlfriend takes this little boy
under her wing and brings him to her home.  Conan now lives at a
detective agency run by Ran's father, but his mind is as keen as
ever and he continues to solve mysteries...always allowing Ran's
father to take all the credit.  As far as everyone's concerned,
Conan is just a little kid anyway...even to Ran.  This is      
*extremely* frustrating to Conan since nobody will listen to a 
'little boy'.  In spite of this, Conan has a mission...to find 
the criminals who did this to him and get the antidote to that 
drug.  This is, first and foremost, a mystery series.  Each    
episode contains a mystery that Conan has to solve. Unlike a lot
of "kids shows", the solutions aren't always obvious and form  
enjoyable brain teasers.  To date, I haven't solved any of the 
mysteries before Conan yet!  :-)

I'm really going to be busy this sem-break watching anime!!! Hmm...but I guess I stil

lhave tocome back toschoolin the middle ofsem-break to serve my 4 hours extension!!! No!

Oh well... that's life...